So, I have been very tense. So much so, that I haven't been able to get my fingers to write anything. But today I managed to string a couple of thoughts together and here I am.
Throughout my life, I have had the blessing of having people around me that have been intelligent, thoughtful, creative, and spiritual. Therefore I have been able to experience conversations with them that usually contained somewhat deep analyses of things. Deeper than your everyday chatter, let's say. The pleasure of "meta-conversations" is something that I have had a hard time to part with. I guess it also comes with the "trade" of being in academia for so many years, and now not being there. The problem for me at this point in my life, is that I don't know how to have "light" conversations anymore . I am feeling a bit socially awkward because I am always bringing up all these issues that might make people feel uncomfortable. Not everyone is ready to talk about social problems, or the upbringing of human beings, or how to solve the planet's environmental issues or why are people involved or not involved with this or that political movement, etc.
And I am not trying to seem "morally superior" because "oh, I can't bother with trivial things", this is ultimately not a quality. I cannot be relaxed and comfortable enough to let life flow and just "be". My husband thinks that I need to drink more and more often. He might be on to something.
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Drinking with friends, maybe :) I think it might be a matter of getting more time just with adults that would allow you to enjoy being light again? After taking care of the kids, it makes sense you'd want to talk about the big stuff. Then, if you got your fill of the big and sometimes heavy stuff, maybe you'd enjoy the silly conversations again?
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